my lack of blogging

I feel this pressure to blog. It’s all put on me by me and no one else. I want to keep this thing going to document life, especially for the kids, but I just can’t make myself do it. I want to journal and expose my heart on record but I am just not at a place where I feel I can do it on the world wide web. I used to have zero problem with that, but lately I am just more guarded. Nothing has happened that scared me away … I think it’s just a season. Sure I could pick up a paper journal and solve the problem just that easily. I just don’t want to. These pages are my life. This is where I want all those thoughts to rest. So, for a while. I will produce some generic posts. I hate just surface topics … but for now that is all I can give.

she got to me

There are just some people … a mom, a dad, a stranger, a kid … that just connect at a deep level within you in an instant.

This is one of those people.

This is her family and I loved hanging out with them.

only hens allowed in the house!

Chicken news: The Rooster is gone! He attacked me about a week ago thinking I was trying to harm his “girls” while trying to scare them away from my pansies by the front door. I kicked him and stupid him came back for more. I kicked him four feet from me and he left a bruise on my shin. I really didn’t think too much about it and then it happened. Friday I heard the most repeated terrified scream EVER. By the time I got outside Games had forced #2 half way down the backyard. He was attacking her over and over and over again. It was horrible. I took off my croc and beat the snot out of him. He came back for more instead of running away. He’s smart enough not to eat leftover hot dogs but he’s dumb enough to come back at me to get another beating with a shoe. Go figure.

I scooped up my sobbing child and brought her in promising I would kill him right away. She did not object. I called my neighbor to borrow an axe. Then my #3 heard the conversation and broke down begging that I not kill him. What’s a mom to do? I call my grandmother (raised on a farm and has killed chickens before) and ask her to help and she tells me to not butcher the rooster. It would just be too traumatic for the kids. I am thinking, “NAH … it’s a cycle of life!” Next idea was to call the local feed store. The owner immediately says, “Chop his head off and have him for Sunday dinner. Once they start attacking they won’t stop.” Then I see my #3. Her face all red and tears streaming down her face and I realize it’s just not worth it. I ask him can he help me in any other way? We make an agreement for me to pack him in a box the next morning and he’d find someone else to “take” him.

So where Games officially is … I do not know … dead or alive … I do not care. I am thankful for the peace and quiet and I am so sure my neighbors are very thankful his crows can no longer be heard at 5 am or at noon or at 3 pm or any other time he felt like being vocal.

Bottom line … no more roosters for me!