things got a little loud

I’d love to sit here and say, “I can always discipline my children very effectively without raising my voice.” Well I can’t. No, I am not an everyday screamer but on occasion when the tension builds my words can get magnified to yucky levels. So that is what happened tonight.

I’ve been trying to clean the house all day. The honey is coming home tonight and it was my goal to have it completed before we had to leave to pick him up. Well the kid’s room was a DISASTER. Seriously you could not take one single step with out crunching down on some lego, polly pocket, book, you name it – everything was on the floor. We’d had a lot of kid company (I don’t clean the kids room if we are having kids over. What is the point) over the past week so it was understandable that it had gotten to that level. I had planned on helping them once they showed they had made and effort to get things going in the right direction. Well that never seemed to happen. SO … I go down to gently motivate AGAIN and I see things aren’t done that they said were done and basically they were, the girls, just sitting around laughing and #3 was trying to jump off the foot board of her bed. (#1 was done. He was doing school work in his corner of the room) Well, I lost it. Monster Mama voice was in full effect. Anyways, I threatened if things were not finished in 30 minutes, I would pick some things to throw away – yes I stooped that low. In 30 minutes I called them up to dinner. While they ate I went and inspected. I was pleased AND big brother was a hero and helped them get the job done. So I am upstairs and the girls and I are hugging and saying our apologies. I look over and #1 has tears in his eyes. So we hug him too. He looks deep in thought for a few minutes and then says VERY respectfully, “Mommy, I think I know why kids don’t like it when their parent’s yell at them like that. Because in that moment the kids probably feel terrible like the person who loves them the most in against them.” He really amazes me at how he can express his feelings. Another touching moment was when I was hugging the girls they said, “You’re the best mommy in the whole wide world.” I replied, “No baby, I mess up a bunch and I am sorry.” #2 says,”It’s ok mommy. Everybody makes mistakes.” She’s right. I love my kids.

OH ,and Ruby laid an EGG!!!!

scoop

scoop in the coop … still only ONE egg. I caved. They’ve been out wandering a few times.

I had this schedule going, a chore list, a menu and all kinds of organized lists (3 pages of them! I know, it’s just SO not me!) … well it’s gone kinda haywire BUT I am determined to get it back.

Today – I had the most revolting, nastiest, grossest experiences EVER. My man and I stopped by to check on a friend’s cabin. Well, who knew but the frig went out weeks ago. So the freezer that was full of meat, ummm, let’s just say it was a fly and maggot paradise and our worst nightmare. Bottom line – I can never be forensic science investigator. Now I know. I can mark that off the “what I want to be once I finished schooling my kids” list.

House – the septic tank got pumped this weekend. We had a bird’s eye view of the whole event from our bedroom window. We opened the window to take a quick pic but then quickly shut it to save us from the smell. The whole experience I am sure will inspire us to do a unit study on waste water sometime next week.

#3 lost another tooth. She’s got the classic “All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth” look AND speech down.

#2 is my biggest helper around the house right now. She delights in it. : )

#1 is still missing his friends a lot.

The man – he’s still the most amazing thing ever. He’s working from home now so we’re like together 24/7. I LOVE it. Now that I said that watch us get in the hugest fight ever tomorrow ; ) ha ha (um, hopefully not!)

Me – Lot’s of deep stuff churning inside of me that I can’t seem to really express. It’s good though. Real good.

OK, here’s some photos.

#3 wanted to take a photo of “she and me”.
The thirty “somethings” are creeping up all over my face!

Baby Sam, he’s a year old now!

chicken talk

Still getting just one egg a day and I am irritated about it. Big Girl lays about 5 to 6 times a week. That’s right on par for her particular breed. Ruby. OH Ruby – she’s, you know – s-mature but she’s NOT laying any eggs. So. NO field trips around the yard until I get two eggs a day TWO days in a row. I remind them of my new rule every day in hopes the others would encourage her to lay but it’s been 4 days now and she has not complied. They are anxious to bust out but I am staying firm. I want two eggs!

Games is crowing. Thankfully it’s not very loud and not too often. You can barely even hear it from inside the house. I swore I’d butcher him once he was vocal – but I am softy after all. He’s just too pretty and I am attached. He’s a great leader for the girls – keeping watch over them while they roam the yard. He is also the first to come to me when I round them up to put them back in the coop. Hopefully it will work out for him to stay around.

Big Girl – the layer

She listening to me say, “Ruby – just lay a freakin’ EGG!”

Games – the man

science

We would like to say thanks to Mr. Box Turtle for sparking our interest and causing us to have an impromptu science lesson first thing this morning. You were a brave little man and endured quite a lot in the short time you were in our home. Thanks for sticking your neck out – literally – and the rest of your appendages so that we could really examine ALL of you. Thanks for your patience as we surfed the web to properly identify you and cram as much as we could in our head about what takes place during your almost 100 year life span. We apologize about the bath, scrubbing your arms and legs with a brush and for pulling at your toes so we could see if you had webbed feet.

Please know you are welcome in our yard anytime.

Just a bunch of blah blah blah

So. The other night I am visiting random blogs – mostly ones I haven’t looked at in 4 plus months – and on one lady’s site I see that she has posted pictures of her garden. It’s AMAZING. All organized in these neat wooden boxes, zero weeds, luscious produce bursting with colors all over the place. Ok, I scroll down. The next post – she’s sewn THE most ADORABLE apron for her little precious preschooler. Keep scrolling. Then I see she has taken up photography. She’s pretty good (NOT amazing but very good). Then keep on keepin’ on scrolling and I read she’s HOMESCHOOLING. She has all these crafty handmade charts, cute book marks she’s made and just all kinds of crafty little things that just make me …. I think the word I should put here is jealous. ??? I like COVET all her talents. Yeah I do some of that stuff but through her words and little snippets of pictures into her little world – it left me feeling not quite inspired but blah. I got up from the “pooter” and walked around the room. I told the hubby about her. Very enthusiastically he replied, “Well just do it. Make it happen. Buy a sewing machine and make stuff. You’ll have a great garden next year!” What a man! But I don’t see myself as having that kind of potential.

You know it’s funny. Comparisons. On and average day (not any day in the first week of a new homeschooling year!) if you were to ask me are you ok with who God design you to be, I’d probably reply. “I feel comfortable with who I am.” But when faced with someone whom I am in awe of their talents, the comparing begins and in the end I look weak and insecure. Thankfully I don’t deal with this very often. Less and less episodes of these internal battles happen the older I get. I seriously doubt they’ll ever go completely away.

So, no. I am not buying a sewing machine. I probably won’t make cute little bookmarks either. I might have a garden next spring but then again, maybe I won’t. And if I do – I sure it will be loaded with lots of weeds! But I am sure that the way I am wired is to be dependent on God. And when I am really trusting and submitting to Him – he brings out my talents when and where they need to shine. He’s designed me … and knowing that gives me immense joy!

*** If you chose to comment on this post – PLEASE DO NOT write “oh you’re great a what you do” – I am not writing this desiring affirmation. This post is just simply a page in my online diary. Thoughts I want to record to remember later. THANKS!

Weekend update

Friday:
Got a visit from a friend who lives in C-town. WHOO HOO! We ALL loved every second of our time with them. OH, Games – our rooster – who has NEVER crowed before – gave 3 shout outs while she was here. Rena – stay away from my chickens!!
HUGE news! One of my best friends got a referral for her China Baby! We got to go over and share in the excitement. I just hugged her and cried. I am so so SO happy for her! I love that we now live so close and that I can really share in this whole experience.

Saturday:
Go Dawgs – well uh – they lost : (
Chris and Brooks came to watch the game! YIPPEEEE! Thankfully we got to do some shopping. Nothing exciting – just groceries and necessities but I sure do love spending time with my Chris.
My #2 was proposed to by their youngest, Banks. He’s 3! Precious.
My #3’s smile was forever changed – she lost a tooth – one in the front.

Sunday:
Made homemade spaghetti.
Took pics of my cousin’s baby – Sam – who is just absolutely adorable.
I have been kinda blue today. My man is about to head out for a week. I physically feel sad. It’s part him leaving and me missing friends. It will pass I know.

she's now six

I just can’t believe it. My baby who refuses to let me baby her is now 6! She’s so precious and VERY entertaining. I am the luckiest woman alive to have her as a daughter.

Swim and ice cream sundaes party! WHOO HOO!

Little family party sharing it with my dad.

I so love my kids. They all bring me such great joy.

don't close the door

A tad bit more insight about myself …

At our new place, when I go out the front door I never close it shut all the way unless we are getting in the car to head somewhere. I also have noticed I don’t like to close the cabinet doors all the way. I often even leave them wide open.

Yesterday as I was heading out to give the chicks a treat and I didn’t close the door all the way. I stopped and made myself back up and close it tight. I realized once I heard the sound of the door completely shut I didn’t like it. So it made me ponder why don’t I like the door shut – all the way closed? It dawned on me. I don’t like things to come to an end. I rarely feel like a project is ever completely over. I don’t like to leave somewhere where I feel relaxed and comfortable but yet I do like to try new things while keeping the safe and comfortable options still open.

So, if you come by and you see something open … don’t close it for me, it’s the way I like it!

:)

first post from the new place

How do I start this thing up again?

Let’s see. We are here. In a new space but with very old surroundings. Mixed emotion.

I am not sure if I want to take the time to document what all has been going on for the past two months.
How about I put it in a few short words: Rest, nature, prayer, hand washed dishes, my first egg, worry, love, started and finished several books, lots of togetherness which was VERY good! Everyone got along without TV, the Wii and computers.

I am thankful. I am blessed. I love many deeply and I know that I am loved as well. My heart’s desire is to be in the middle of what God is doing. Here, there … anywhere.